Kendo
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- 143
This is the first installment in my series of articles entitled;
The Incredible Trials and Tribulations of a Canna-consultant
In this series I will highlight the misconceptions, misinformation, attitudes, and just plain old out in left field things that make canna-consulting a breed all unto itself.
The first installment is 100% indicative of how far out in left field one might be asked to go in this business. .
Ghosts in my ganja.
As I sit here contemplating how to write this I can’t help but recognize that pit in the stomach feeling that comes from instinct. When you just know, something aint right!
Well let me tell you,” something just aint right”. I’ve got ghosts in my indoor garden.
I know, I can hear ya….”WTH are you thinkin Kendo?” Ghosts! If this was not happening right here in front of me I would be skeptical too. Yep, yep, as crazy as it may sound, I am convinced that I have metaphysical presence’ at play in my home and garden. The numerous unexplained occurrences in my NEW home are bad enough but when the garden is screwed with, well..DAMN!!!!
Let me run down some history and then get into the actual events.
My family and I moved into our home about 6 years ago, a brand new home set on acreage it was a dream for us all. Shortly after moving in I purchased a used single wide mobile home to use as an office and to house a modest grow area for medicinal purposes.
Right on time and ready to go the trailer was really a godsend. I was told that a cantankerous old shoot –em-up drunk had passed away in his rocker in the front room. He died watching his six w/ a pistol in his lap and an empty bottle of whiskey by his side.…CLASSIC…. The owners also said that renters were convinced that the old guy was around, that they could, “just feel him watching” She said she just felt she needed to let me know.
As a prequel we will start with my home and then move back to the trailer a bit later on.
After my dad passed away we began having weird unexplained events take place in the house. A very funny prankster type he always swore me he was going to come back and haunt me for the ish I put him and my mom through when I was a rebellious youth.
Within weeks of his passing the electronic anomalies began, TV coming on by itself to some quote my dad would say, Pandora playing his favorite 60's Stan Getz Bossa nova tunes while on Mudvayne radio, this with no bossa nova or jazz stations in the lists.
Smoke alarms going off all together w/ no smoke, turning off when I asked pops to stop……… these things happened more than a few times. One of the cabinet doors opened 5" and closed right in front of my face just the other day.
The most surreal encounter happened one evening as we were all watching TV. The first sign was from the dogs. Both of them raised their heads in unison from a DEAD sleep, they got that low growl, ears pasted down, hackles up, doggie WTF! Look. The hair on the back of my neck was up as well. My wife turned to me with that Poltergeist movie look and said,” Somebody is here” very receptive to enegy she knows these things. Immediately my oldest son screeched like a 6’3” 250 lb girl, as my wife, my youngest son and I turned to watch a heavy stool moved several feet of its own power. Needless to say we were all left shaken up and curious at the same time.
Lights going on and off, doors opening and closing on their own and every once in a while I feel a gentle caress on my back just like pops used to do when he wanted to let me know he loved me.
Now on to the grow trailer and one of the frustrating scenarios and the ways I have decided to deal with it.
New trailer, I get setup and growing, everything is rolling and on autopilot. After a couple of flawless runs one day I see some foxtailing at 5 weeks into flower??!!?? WTH!! The brain goes through the nitrogen scenarios, stress, and of course light. Check all parameters, nothing, everything is tits. So I go back through even more thoroughly, instead of visually inspecting my timers, I use my fingers to run along the whole dial of each timer….BAMM!!!! 1 tic on..1Timer….2 lights…15 minutes everyday, every off cycle for..HOW LONG??
I am besides myself, literally. HTF! does that happen. NO ONE enters the Dragon, these timers are at 7’ and out of any range of contact. You scratch your chin, think of any plausible explanation and move on. I of course checked the timers daily for a couple of weeks and then forgot about the whole thing once I saved the loose crop from total failure.
Months pass, crops succeed and one daily inspection at about 5 weeks..I see the first signs of bolt. Immediately going to the timers I see, a different timer, 1 tic on, mid-off cycle, in virtually the same spot as the last timer anomaly. I am left seriously tripping because there is no reasonable explanation for the physical, change in state on those timers. Some have speculated rodents. I considered that as well. The fact that I sweep that place on the daily and have NEVER seen a rodent dropping makes me extremely skeptical.
I place all timers in a different location and set them up so the no contact can possibly be made with them physically. Keeping a very close eye on the cycles I developed a habit of checking timers physically before I leave each day through the Plexiglas pane they are behind. Within weeks of that adjustment I enter the grow area and discover the standard incandescent overhead light is on, flipped up at the switch.
Physically behind a tomato cage with the switch covered so that there was no way to contact the switch itself without serious effort. I went through and physically unscrewed bulbs from their sockets. Twice following this incident I found switches in the on position.
A few months later I enter the garden and one of the tempered glass panes in a hood is shattered, glass everywhere. Checking the Temp/RH gauge I saw that the temp rose a couple of degrees and stayed at that temp. No sudden high temps, no abrupt change in airflow,” Backpressure” WTH! Never seen a tempered glass pane JUST shatter for no reason. I contact sun and they tell me tempered glass does not shatter like that without some external force i.e. blunt force contact with an object, backpressure, and or incredible heat.
Obviously they told me they would not replace my pane, doing so I moved on and kept a close eye on things. 6 months with no incidents I am feeling pretty good until I walk into another shattered tempered glass pane. The unit was only 6 months old and again there was no temp, pressure or physical contact to explain the event.
As you can imagine I have become pretty tired of playing these ghostly games and like Honey Badger IDGAF what, where, when, or how. We gotta get this dealt with NOW!!!!!
I begin to think hard on alternative solutions to this dilemma. Obviously this ghost can make things very difficult for me and I had been playing cat and mouse in dealing with problems after they arise. How to end this problem? I came up with a solution that seems to have worked out well for us both.
I found out that he loved cheap whiskey, chocolate and Pall Mall non-filtered cigarettes. I had also found a few really old pictures lost behind a cabinet. I placed the pics up in a spot by the front window where the old guy would sit and keep an eye on his property. I placed a bottle of Jameson with a shot glass, a couple of Hershey bars and a pack of Pall Mall non-filters there as well.
Once I got things placed I sat down to talk to him. Opening the Jameson I poured us each a shot and lit a pall mall, I could literally feel the energy change in the room immediately to one of nervous expectation, like a child opening a Christmas gift.
I introduced myself and thanked him for the use of his home and took my shot. I told him that I really appreciated his company and his watchful intent. I told him that I hoped we could be partners in keeping this home and its contents safe. In the end I told him I would be willing to keep his stash of Whiskey and smokes on tap and that we could talk anytime. I felt an intense feeling of sad joy that made a tear streak my cheek. I am convinced that he was lonely in life and even more so in death. Since that time I have had zero incidents. I can feel his presence and at times just talk to him about whatever.
I replace the shot when it evaporates and light a Pall Mall. Each and every time I do I feel the energy shift. I take a minute and talk about some local stuff because I really feel he is listening intently.
It has been a very trippy ride to say the least but I have to say it has been very fulfilling as well. Who would have thought that creating a parlay with a metaphysical entity would be a real scenario for a canna consultant to find a solution to.
Humble blessings and of course strongest of Kendo huggz
Kendo Green Wizard
The Incredible Trials and Tribulations of a Canna-consultant
In this series I will highlight the misconceptions, misinformation, attitudes, and just plain old out in left field things that make canna-consulting a breed all unto itself.
The first installment is 100% indicative of how far out in left field one might be asked to go in this business. .
Ghosts in my ganja.
As I sit here contemplating how to write this I can’t help but recognize that pit in the stomach feeling that comes from instinct. When you just know, something aint right!
Well let me tell you,” something just aint right”. I’ve got ghosts in my indoor garden.
I know, I can hear ya….”WTH are you thinkin Kendo?” Ghosts! If this was not happening right here in front of me I would be skeptical too. Yep, yep, as crazy as it may sound, I am convinced that I have metaphysical presence’ at play in my home and garden. The numerous unexplained occurrences in my NEW home are bad enough but when the garden is screwed with, well..DAMN!!!!
Let me run down some history and then get into the actual events.
My family and I moved into our home about 6 years ago, a brand new home set on acreage it was a dream for us all. Shortly after moving in I purchased a used single wide mobile home to use as an office and to house a modest grow area for medicinal purposes.
Right on time and ready to go the trailer was really a godsend. I was told that a cantankerous old shoot –em-up drunk had passed away in his rocker in the front room. He died watching his six w/ a pistol in his lap and an empty bottle of whiskey by his side.…CLASSIC…. The owners also said that renters were convinced that the old guy was around, that they could, “just feel him watching” She said she just felt she needed to let me know.
As a prequel we will start with my home and then move back to the trailer a bit later on.
After my dad passed away we began having weird unexplained events take place in the house. A very funny prankster type he always swore me he was going to come back and haunt me for the ish I put him and my mom through when I was a rebellious youth.
Within weeks of his passing the electronic anomalies began, TV coming on by itself to some quote my dad would say, Pandora playing his favorite 60's Stan Getz Bossa nova tunes while on Mudvayne radio, this with no bossa nova or jazz stations in the lists.
Smoke alarms going off all together w/ no smoke, turning off when I asked pops to stop……… these things happened more than a few times. One of the cabinet doors opened 5" and closed right in front of my face just the other day.
The most surreal encounter happened one evening as we were all watching TV. The first sign was from the dogs. Both of them raised their heads in unison from a DEAD sleep, they got that low growl, ears pasted down, hackles up, doggie WTF! Look. The hair on the back of my neck was up as well. My wife turned to me with that Poltergeist movie look and said,” Somebody is here” very receptive to enegy she knows these things. Immediately my oldest son screeched like a 6’3” 250 lb girl, as my wife, my youngest son and I turned to watch a heavy stool moved several feet of its own power. Needless to say we were all left shaken up and curious at the same time.
Lights going on and off, doors opening and closing on their own and every once in a while I feel a gentle caress on my back just like pops used to do when he wanted to let me know he loved me.
Now on to the grow trailer and one of the frustrating scenarios and the ways I have decided to deal with it.
New trailer, I get setup and growing, everything is rolling and on autopilot. After a couple of flawless runs one day I see some foxtailing at 5 weeks into flower??!!?? WTH!! The brain goes through the nitrogen scenarios, stress, and of course light. Check all parameters, nothing, everything is tits. So I go back through even more thoroughly, instead of visually inspecting my timers, I use my fingers to run along the whole dial of each timer….BAMM!!!! 1 tic on..1Timer….2 lights…15 minutes everyday, every off cycle for..HOW LONG??
I am besides myself, literally. HTF! does that happen. NO ONE enters the Dragon, these timers are at 7’ and out of any range of contact. You scratch your chin, think of any plausible explanation and move on. I of course checked the timers daily for a couple of weeks and then forgot about the whole thing once I saved the loose crop from total failure.
Months pass, crops succeed and one daily inspection at about 5 weeks..I see the first signs of bolt. Immediately going to the timers I see, a different timer, 1 tic on, mid-off cycle, in virtually the same spot as the last timer anomaly. I am left seriously tripping because there is no reasonable explanation for the physical, change in state on those timers. Some have speculated rodents. I considered that as well. The fact that I sweep that place on the daily and have NEVER seen a rodent dropping makes me extremely skeptical.
I place all timers in a different location and set them up so the no contact can possibly be made with them physically. Keeping a very close eye on the cycles I developed a habit of checking timers physically before I leave each day through the Plexiglas pane they are behind. Within weeks of that adjustment I enter the grow area and discover the standard incandescent overhead light is on, flipped up at the switch.
Physically behind a tomato cage with the switch covered so that there was no way to contact the switch itself without serious effort. I went through and physically unscrewed bulbs from their sockets. Twice following this incident I found switches in the on position.
A few months later I enter the garden and one of the tempered glass panes in a hood is shattered, glass everywhere. Checking the Temp/RH gauge I saw that the temp rose a couple of degrees and stayed at that temp. No sudden high temps, no abrupt change in airflow,” Backpressure” WTH! Never seen a tempered glass pane JUST shatter for no reason. I contact sun and they tell me tempered glass does not shatter like that without some external force i.e. blunt force contact with an object, backpressure, and or incredible heat.
Obviously they told me they would not replace my pane, doing so I moved on and kept a close eye on things. 6 months with no incidents I am feeling pretty good until I walk into another shattered tempered glass pane. The unit was only 6 months old and again there was no temp, pressure or physical contact to explain the event.
As you can imagine I have become pretty tired of playing these ghostly games and like Honey Badger IDGAF what, where, when, or how. We gotta get this dealt with NOW!!!!!
I begin to think hard on alternative solutions to this dilemma. Obviously this ghost can make things very difficult for me and I had been playing cat and mouse in dealing with problems after they arise. How to end this problem? I came up with a solution that seems to have worked out well for us both.
I found out that he loved cheap whiskey, chocolate and Pall Mall non-filtered cigarettes. I had also found a few really old pictures lost behind a cabinet. I placed the pics up in a spot by the front window where the old guy would sit and keep an eye on his property. I placed a bottle of Jameson with a shot glass, a couple of Hershey bars and a pack of Pall Mall non-filters there as well.
Once I got things placed I sat down to talk to him. Opening the Jameson I poured us each a shot and lit a pall mall, I could literally feel the energy change in the room immediately to one of nervous expectation, like a child opening a Christmas gift.
I introduced myself and thanked him for the use of his home and took my shot. I told him that I really appreciated his company and his watchful intent. I told him that I hoped we could be partners in keeping this home and its contents safe. In the end I told him I would be willing to keep his stash of Whiskey and smokes on tap and that we could talk anytime. I felt an intense feeling of sad joy that made a tear streak my cheek. I am convinced that he was lonely in life and even more so in death. Since that time I have had zero incidents. I can feel his presence and at times just talk to him about whatever.
I replace the shot when it evaporates and light a Pall Mall. Each and every time I do I feel the energy shift. I take a minute and talk about some local stuff because I really feel he is listening intently.
It has been a very trippy ride to say the least but I have to say it has been very fulfilling as well. Who would have thought that creating a parlay with a metaphysical entity would be a real scenario for a canna consultant to find a solution to.
Humble blessings and of course strongest of Kendo huggz
Kendo Green Wizard
