what we sacrafice to grow

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wesbrks

46
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sacrafice,, such a huge word... many meanings.. i know i myself have given up too much in life over the persuit of growing. so many things,, was and is not worth it,, for any of you newbees that thanks growing pot is all fun and games,, guess again.. i have lost a 14 yr marriage,, barely get to see my 3 boys..and the love of my life absolutely hates me... that was a few summers ago.. now its girlfriend after girlfreind,, cant ever really get attached.. is hard to be so numb.. my recent ,, chrissey,, absolutly stunning to look at,, a perfect 10.. also on the inside,, let her in my life a little but had to hide the facts of what i am.. she finally broke it off with me today,, cause i couldnt commit to anything.. wont even speak to me now.. its to late.. but dam,, i loved her.. should of married her.. should of given up this crazy persuit.. i have few friends,, family is far away.. this summer is already planned.. everything is almost done for this yrs adventure.. is it worth it,, the money,, the smoke.... fuck no... i fucked up..and im alone again..
 
B

bannana man

Guest
were you from mate ?,,,can you not tell her what you do once you get too know her properly ?


i do know what you mean about sacrifice ,its not easy
 
D

Dr Herbal

Guest
To be honest mate i was thinkin same thing this mornin is it all worth it.Do I want a propa life.I will not allow myself to get in any relationships its only onenite stands for me if i can be arsed to go out I dont like drinking so it aint offten.I to dont have many mates due to alot of them moving on and the fact people think your a bit funny you carnt let them round your house theres only so many excuses you can give, so i find my self on my own sitting in my pad more and more. Ive bin sat here all day thinking about evrything weighing the pros and cons.THEN my lights came on i walked into my rooms and a smile hit my face instantly and all the negative thought just went out my head.I sat there in the middle of my room watching the buds sway from side to side for an age thinkin and that i dont need loads of friends i have a few very close friends my tight nit camunity and being in a relation ship for me is to much agro i personally desided i just carnt be arsed with relationships.So for the time being i am gonna carry on with what iam doing.I must say if id of known where this would lead when i first started i dont no if i would of started at all.I deffently say all people starting up should think long and hard about evrything that will be sacraficed and gained before you start growing anything
 
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SenorMota

147
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ahhhh, if only I had a time machine to rent out.

sorry wesbrks for your loss.
 
Z

Zoolander

Premium Member
Supporter
1,686
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I've given up more then I can remember but it has been worth it because of the knowledge and the happiness my plants have brought me . Money , I spend more on this then I can ever get back so it's got to be because you love it or it will just cause you grief and a lack of life and friends . I think before you do this you should just sit back and think real hard about what you will be giving up . You can love someboby and they can leave you , cheat or some other bullshit but your plants are like a pet they just love you:blush I have met a couple people online from growing that I feel are real friends even if we don't hang;)
 
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wesbrks

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from the u.s.. cant tell her anything,, no one,, ive got more money then i can spend,, yrs of growing outdoors have served me well but damm,, its just not worth it,, i miss love,, relationships,, having that perfect lady with the most beautifull smile,, the one that just melts your heart. your best friend.. man i fucked up again.. she was only the 2nd woman i have loved in my life,,im in my 40's .. i hate the one night stands,, their ok at first.. but dam,, not the same as making real love to a women you care about..this will be my last year.. i do not want to wake up alone anymore.. man im going miss her.. i wish things were different,, i wish i was different,, i think its ok to grow recreational.. no big deal,, but to make it a profession,,dont do it people.. its not worth it,, hell,, i dont even smoke anymore..not for many yrs,, i just do it for the love of growing it and the cash.. i would trade it all to have her back,, to hear her laugh,, smile, to hold her hands again.. i feel like shit.. tear after tear,, no one to blame but me.. peace
 
J

Juan

Guest
Bro I beleive when you find who you were really meant to be with things just work out unconditionally. But I understand heart ache also. My wife
is very very sick and I having to accept to myself i'm gonna be alone soon. I come from a very poor country where the herb is a valuable resource people can some what control. But with it comes much violence. Here in America theres a whole lot of what I thinks really childish drama amongst jealous and greedy competitors because of the crazy value potent mota demands. Not too mention the paranoia of cops constanly kickin in your door or rivals loosing it and snitchin ya off. It makes it hard to just try n grow your meds and not worry. I'm new to tryin this indoors but my teacher and wifes
med provider works so hard it seems and tries so hard and like you although I have nada doubt hes very succesful financially, he don't seem so happy either. Seems hes just got a lot of problems all around but I know a lot of its from his mj hobby but at the same time hes passionate about it unbeleivable. You can hear in his voice and tell by what he says he dont like what load he carries even though he worry so much about us we kinda worry about him. he also seems so alone as you say bro.
I think the pressure is something all growers gotta deal with somewhat and as I venture into this project its hard to know how much I too want to try to handle.

Feel for ya though my friend hang in there either your gal will come back or there is someone better out there for ya. nice to meet yah guys
 
M

MBlive420

6
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Better you than me. In my early years a heart break lasted forever! My break-ups were always center around weed. Iv'e learned you can't love yourself or a women fully if your in love with MariJane. Smoking and growing weed for me, has only complicated my life! I am in my late Thirties and fucked-up three really great women.Unfortunitely, the older I get the less I give a shit and the more independent I become. I make enough money for two income's from a real career. So, I really don't need a relationship for that. I actually prefer a new girl every three to four months. If you want to flood your life with all that emotional bullshit that's fine but don't expect to be really successful in life with these useless obessions. See the thing is that nobody can save you... well maybe god.. but if you stand tall and firm and confident people will follow you. You will attrack Good people. If you go around depressed you will attrack loser assholes. Sometimes It seems the more people you piss-off the more negitive vibes eminate back to you. Yes, I do love this growing science too, but sometimes you need to break away from it and take a break, especially if things are fuck-up! What your feeling is normal relationship depression but unfortunitely, years of smoking has dampen your serotonin levels...meaning you might have depression swings longer or deeper. Exercise daily and that will disappear immediately. Depression is freaking huge if your trying to racialize with the correct behavior for a relationship. I studied the shit of this theory and do believe that the only answer to your delema my friend ....is to ...... Find a Chic that Smokes!
Cheer-up man! Stop growing and see if your life improves...if it does, there's your answer. If it doesn't buy some beans from THC Farmer and start growing! and in the mean-time , " stop your fucking wining and go out and get Laid...and God sakes smoke a fucking joint man.

The Doc
 
og dmc

og dmc

363
63
Well the other side to the coin is havingn a legit job that pays well but is so stressful that you become an ahole. That is my situation. I was going to give up growing butnow that I am single again I may not. Either way it sucks but its easier to blame it on your profesion than to take responsibility. I am not speaking to anyone but myself. Just so you know, the grass isnt greener on the other side,
 
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stone69

436
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I've given up more then I can remember but it has been worth it because of the knowledge and the happiness my plants have brought me . Money , I spend more on this then I can ever get back so it's got to be because you love it or it will just cause you grief and a lack of life and friends . I think before you do this you should just sit back and think real hard about what you will be giving up . You can love someboby and they can leave you , cheat or some other bullshit but your plants are like a pet they just love you:blush I have met a couple people online from growing that I feel are real friends even if we don't hang;)




Spoke like a pro! Grow on... :anim_19:
 
G

greyfx

212
18
Im young. I will be 21 next month and have been growing for a few years. About six months ago I moved down south, and will now be moving a couple states to the west of me. Why? Because my grow is compromised everything fucked hationad to destroy plants that I spent time and care into. I really didnt mind losing the profit or losing my money but what really the most was to chop down my plants. I realize that I will get to grow again soon in another location. Growing just makes me happy I love it.

I can't say I've had relationship problems based on growing or the game. My girlfriend of 6 years is like my best friend, partner in crime. I do realize however that humans are flawed and we all make mistakes. If I tell someone my grows location and it gets out. Its all my fault and I don't blame anyone but myself because I could have prevented it.

That's just one mistake learned that won't be repeated.
 
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bogglegum

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the way i see it women are never happy anyways....you can be a doctor... her complaint you spend to much time at work.....you can be a office worker... her complaint your cheating with a co worker.........you can grow..... her complaint you spend to much time starring at those beautiful plants.........you can work at a resturant...her complaint you dont make enough money........you can be a broke bumb who just sits under her all day catering to her every need....her complaint you spend to much time at home plus she is always going to point out how broke you are everytime she gets mad .... I learned you have to whats going to make you happy. :rauch08:
 
M

MBlive420

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Yes, I have mood swings sometimes and I immediately know I have been smoking too much and not getting enough sleep or exercise. I try like Hell to only smoke on the weekends. Can you believe it? and I will tell you why. I had a point in my life that things got way out of control. I was basically growing some Rocket Fuel Sativa's and Boy did it Make me weird. I basically hid out in my house for a couple of years. I totally Isolated myself from the world. I gained alot of weight, got depressed and I broke off relationships with people, family and girlfriends. It seemed like all I needed was my lab and my pet Bird and a large aqurium of Bud sampling lizards and I was happy. I grew some unbelievable Hawian Sativa x Cotton Candy Idica from Federation.Wow! I got Pheno that Grew That a Sativa tree with the Indica size Buds, unbelieveble Crystals and a Sativa High that had no Ceiling. In fact it would make you jittering if you smoke too much...I think it was because of the freshness. That shit made me think....alot! I knew that I wasn't same anymore and I needed to get back to the normal and real happy me. For me it meant regaining some control over smoking and growing . I'm not trying bring anybody down but what I learned is that the stronger the strain you grow, comes with great responsibility and if you abuse it too much it will mess your head-up and yes cause wicked mood swings, something that will get you Fired from your job and then you have real problems. Also before I forget. I do believe you get greater mood swings with Hydro than you do Soil.
Og It's good that you understand yourself. Yeah, you can blame stress but in reality it's because we smoke to much and cant handle the stress. Well, for me it seems to be the situation. Anyway, It's Sunday and Sunny in NJ and I get smoke today! Yipeee! It still amazes me how happy I get when I can smoke. One word.......Addicted! lol! God I miss that Sativa! Anybody like Sativa's from Federation??

Stay Kool, Healthy, Happy and Most of all Stay Green!

-Mblive
 
4

420Gemmy

79
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I'm so sorry to hear that dude, wish I had some words of wisdom to help you...
 
T

Trillion

Guest
If you can't be 100% truthful with your partner it can never work, even if you stay together it would never be right. The paranoia will grow in your mind and no matter how well you hide it women just KNOW when you're not being straight up with them. Doesn't matter what the secret is, it will begin to have an effect on your behaviour, which will lead to a change in the way she perceives you and will ultimately lead to the breakdown of all trust (even if she does not verbalise this it IS happening). If you can't share the way you live your life and earn a living with her do YOU really trust/respect her?
 
C

cway

Guest
the way i see it women are never happy anyways....you can be a doctor... her complaint you spend to much time at work.....you can be a office worker... her complaint your cheating with a co worker.........you can grow..... her complaint you spend to much time starring at those beautiful plants.........you can work at a resturant...her complaint you dont make enough money........you can be a broke bumb who just sits under her all day catering to her every need....her complaint you spend to much time at home plus she is always going to point out how broke you are everytime she gets mad .... I learned you have to whats going to make you happy. :rauch08:


This just about sums it up. I am lucky enough that my Love of my life is a Undercover Stoner and she kinda put me on to growing.. She introduced me to my Ganja Sensei and she is cool with it. Here is the deal though.. You cant let it control your life.. Excercise is key... Releases endorphins that give you a happy high... Most important If your in the game long enough you will get busted.. Make your $$ then invest in something legit..


Me all my true friends are smoker and growers and even my Mom and Dad know that I grow pot.. So I thinks its all about what you make of it...

Lying about what you do for a living does suck but I just tell people that I am a Venture Capitalist and cannot discuss my Investments for privacy reasons... Works Pretty Well...



Peace
 
B

Boywonder

Guest
Find a lady farmer. There must be some lady farmers out there. Hey Logic, how bout "THCDate" lol :)
 
K

kill-9

Guest
If you're using cannabis as a profit, just know that, you can't be slanging forever. Nobody wants to live a life of paranoia, especially women.

In any case, it's hard to find a good woman who doesnt mind smoke or does smoke. Life is like that, oh well.
 
eyes

eyes

65
6
its a very complicated decision.Growing definitely is an addictive hobby/profession.If you def make it your profession it does get lonely.just as someone has said,you cant have people over and its hard to have a grl just like you said.as you get older you start to think differently.you want someone more steady and it gets difficult to make the right choice.If you have the $ like you said decision isnt that difficult anymore.You stated it was a business. so if that was the case,close up shop,get yourself someone you can be with on a long term and open a legitamate business.that way you dont have to hide anymore.you already got the cash,now get the grl get a business and be thankful you didnt get caught.

I got a grl for awhile and im almost your age.so i know what you are talking about.been awhile since ive had the opportunity to do anything.part of me says id be a fool to go back in.It is an addictive hobby.not a day that goes by that i dont think bout it.but for what reasons?the $ the love of it?Nobody can tell you what to do,but i can tell you from experience that if u got the cash,leave the poker table why you are ahead.you can always come here and watch others grow.Thats what i do.i try to help others with advice.thats about the extent of it 4 me.sux.
 
M

MBlive420

6
0
Yes, Every Farmer needs a partner in crime, undercover mother that likes to garden...like Mom. That's another story for some of us that can turn out bad.
Here's my story: I had a smoker girlfriend a few years ago. At first it was great! We shared some really great times and smoke some of the Mad Creations I made. She never knew about the covert operation at a different location and she didn't mind going into the fridge for a ziplock of sweet, mad potent bud when she wanted. I basically told her I get it from a friend that gardens outside once a year and he gives it to me for free. So, long story short, I think I indulged her to much and I got her hooked on some green crack. I guess we both weren't use to smoking this high quality bud ( that crop turned out to be an Advanced Nutrients test run and those nutrients really increased potency). We ended up smoking everyday and she started fucking-up at work, school, she got pregnant ( f'in forget to take her pills.) So, Basically, It got out of control and all that bad Karma started happening. Unfortunitely, she had a miscarriage A month into it and it ruined us. We parted and yes the guilt floodgate opened and I just had to leave her. She was broken down and depressed. She hates me! Sad and I'm a asshole! That's when you know you got to control it or it will destroy you. Like cway said, " you can't let it control your life". The Moral of my story is that smoker Chic isn't always good. She needs to handle her shit. I learned it the hard way. Well, fellows what it comes down too....is you can't fuck a pot plant.
You decide???
 

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