THE TRAINWRECK. Brought to you by thcfarrmer…..

[Azton]

When im at the gym i say "Dude, please dont" in my head to myself at least 4 or 5 times before i leave

Feels.

believe it or not, i dont talk much in the real word, some days i go without saying a single word i think. And if someone i dont know walks up to me and starts talking, generally i just glare at them til they leave and couldnt say anything even if i wanted to. I get trapped by Gym bro's every time i go. I eventually ended up invested in my own bikes and equipment.

if keyboard based communication didnt exist, i would have stayed stuck with the learning disabled groups through school, and even my own family would have thought there was something bad wrong with my brain. I got lucky i was born when i did.

I feel that with age my patience gland has shrunk into a raisin. Maybe it follows my liver. Is patience liver based? Im not a scientist. But I used to stand polite and listen to people and now I can just say "I dont want to listen to this" and leave. Maybe its that I feel I have enough people in my life, I dont know. On a serious note I should start working on my behavior. But Im so damn fed up. I can only relate to other stoners I feel. This thread is 50% of my social life now, the rest is family.

 

[Thatoneguyyouknow_]

I feel that with age my patience gland has shrunk into a raisin. Maybe it follows my liver. Is patience liver based? Im not a scientist. But I used to stand polite and listen to people and now I can just say "I dont want to listen to this" and leave. Maybe its that I feel I have enough people in my life, I dont know. On a serious note I should start working on my behavior. But Im so damn fed up. I can only relate to other stoners I feel. This thread is 50% of my social life now, the rest is family.

Being Cynical and jaded is just part of maturing as a rational human being im pretty sure lmao. So now i gotta tell the story of my last day at a public gym because you mentioned Liver lol.

The very last time i went to a public gym i was on the bikes doing a few miles. And there was this fairly ripped dude (makes me look skinny lol) i kept catching watching me. Eventually he walked over and got on the bike next to me, he was there with a lady friend. I knew what was up so i picked up the pace and raised the incline to 14%. But this was a mistake, because 5 mins later dudes already left, theres a gross wet spot on the floor around the bike he was gone, and my air smelled like liver an onions even with the bike fan going. No joke, its a unique food smell, i know exactly what i was smelling. He was sweating straight liver and onion. Never even said a word to the guy, he left as dejected as ive ever seen someone leave a context.

But yea, that was the last gym experience i had. I guess the moral here is an obvious one. Theres 3 actually.


1. Don't skip leg day

2. Cardio is important.

3. Don't be an asshole

 

[MrGreenfinga]

My dog giving me a crazy side eye

 

[GNick55]

When im at the gym i say "Dude, please dont" in my head to myself at least 4 or 5 times before i leave

Feels.

believe it or not, i dont talk much in the real word, some days i go without saying a single word i think. And if someone i dont know walks up to me and starts talking, generally i just glare at them til they leave and couldnt say anything even if i wanted to. At the gym, dudes just think im interested in whatever theyre talking about. I get trapped by Gym bro's every time i go. I eventually ended up invested in my own bikes and equipment.

if keyboard based communication didnt exist, i would have stayed stuck with the learning disabled groups through school, and even my own family would have thought there was something bad wrong with my brain. I got lucky i was born when i was.

no way in hell you go a day without talking,. geezus murphy i feel your the type to talk to yourself if no one else is around? hahahah…

 

[GNick55]

My dog giving me a crazy side eyeView attachment 2220833

planning on rolling out of bed any time soon??

 

[MrGreenfinga]

planning on rolling out of bed any time soon??

Now that you're saying it definitely not

 

[MrGreenfinga]

no way in hell you go a day without talking,. geezus murphy i feel your the type to talk to yourself if no one else is around? hahahah…

Dont know if this is the case but in some cases anxiety can get so severe it disables a persons ability to speak
gotta be a bummer to have to live with
And who the fuck doesnt talk to themselves?

 

[Week4Bytch]

if youre asking if thats a kush, nah, its allegedly the result of the original jack herer and big bud genetics left to interbreed pollen chuck style for nearly 30 seasons on an old deadhead's patch in the ozark mountains.

Ive been calling them OJ x BB, but i might start calling them cousin Thetus or something.

If your asking what a kush is, the meaning of the word is death/death of/killer of. Hindu kush the mountains, probably mean its a deadly place for Hindi's (total guess, but considering the area is largely muslim, probably a safe assumption, the good ole Hindi death mountains). Kush the cannabis plants hail from the landraces that grow in these regions and the name comes from the mountains.

I had a Bubba Kush do the same, branches everywhere.

 

[Azton]

I talk to food items. Like potatoes or meat. Oranges are good. Fish fingers are full of it.

 

[leroygreen]

This plant is a great yielder! Will pull 6 plus ounces at 33" tall 22x22" wide. She will run around 90 days, just started final swell.

 

[Azton]

I talk to my plants every day too.

 

[leroygreen]

So wife and I were recalling old memories. She actually has known my biological dad side of family longer than I have. She was my younger cousins Best friend growing up.

Anyway, my bio dad had tourettes syndrome and took very little in life seriously as nobody ever took him seriously as they had very little understanding of the conversation.

So one night he calls a 7-11 and tell the employee he has a gun on him from a distance and the employee is to put all the cash in store in a brown bag and leave it in the dumpster. The whole time he is sitting in a chair iny aunts house drinking Budweiser double deuces. While we are all gathered around the police scanner listening to the events as they go down. It really was a riot. I have so many stories of the crazy shit that went down back then. He is now deceased. Rip dad !

 

[PlumberSoCal2]

 

[GNick55]

Dont know if this is the case but in some cases anxiety can get so severe it disables a persons ability to speak
gotta be a bummer to have to live with
And who the fuck doesnt talk to themselves?

i do on a regular basis haha

 

[Thatoneguyyouknow_]

no way in hell you go a day without talking,. geezus murphy i feel your the type to talk to yourself if no one else is around? hahahah…

people who know me online that ive met in person are always very shocked, and vice versa. People who know me in real life come across my social media personality, and are mind blown.

Its easier for me to talk to a camera then another person face to face if i dont already know them, or arent super comfortable around them. I didnt talk to anyone even my own family til i was about 6 years old, and i did it through a keyboard my dad brought home for his first home computer because i had already taught myself to read, i taught myself to read before i started kindergarten. I was already in a 1st grade learning disabled classroom at the point my dad brought a keyboard into the house. I had some kind of frustration block going on with using a pen or pencil too. I would get super frustrated, and often somewhat violent and upset if i felt i was being forced to use something like that as a little kid.

People are way better at finding ways to communicate with functioning spectrum kids now a days though.

But yea, I avoid meeting new people in real life the the fuckin plague man. The anxiety is unreal. I make every possible excuse i can come up with to avoid it entirely.

I hardcore latch on to social media though, in often unhealthy ways, hence that nearly 10 year forum hiatus i mention sometimes. I dont really give myself other opportunities to be genuinely social with new people.

 

[Thatoneguyyouknow_]

Dont know if this is the case but in some cases anxiety can get so severe it disables a persons ability to speak
gotta be a bummer to have to live with
And who the fuck doesnt talk to themselves?

nailed it to some degree lol.


And I def do ramble to myself a lot, helps me not forget what im doing, i wasnt exactly counting that though lmao.

 

[Thatoneguyyouknow_]

Here's something wild lol, apparently im partially synesthetic. Sometimes i can see where sounds come from. Like a purple chartreuse after image light (the kind when you close your eyes after looking at a light bulb) where it originated if its loud and abrupt enough. Like at the location of the sounds origin. It's more accurate when it happens for telling what direction a sound came from then my hearing is.

Some people with really severe synesthesia literally see numbers on paper as rotating 3 dimensional geometries. It's pretty wild. That's apparently the most common form.

I actually didnt even realize that my form of it wasnt something everyone had until i switched to a new therapist when i settled down in KC. I just thought that was a thing that happens when you hear a loud sound my entire life.


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Double empathy, explained

The double empathy theory challenges the idea that social difficulties are specific to autism and suggests that problems arise from a mismatch in perspective between autistic and non-autistic people.

www.thetransmitter.org

Most functioning autistic people live in a pretty solid fear of social interaction with anyone who does not know them very well, it's not that we dont want to interact though, it's just that we are very well aware how badly its going to go if we do. And how much worse it'll get if we panic or freeze up or something. Most people interacting with that, either just from that moment on forever act like theres something wrong with you, or they forever just act like theyre the reason it happened that and infinitely more is already going through my head the second i see you coming towards me, especially if im not doing something physical i can focus on.

Im sure it's been pretty obvious i dont really understand how being social is supposed to work It feels bizarre as hell to me, that there's even a "way" youre supposed to be social.


And trying to actually explain all of this to a new person face to face in a social situation while already trying to fight off sensory overload? Nah, that's a bad idea lmao. Comes back around to why im not a concert fella even though im a guitar player. Why i couldnt take NOAA anymore, and why im a lowly groundskeeper with a college education. I could pull like a $1800 a month ssdi check if i wanted to, but thats a lot less then i pull in on my own. And it would prevent me from actually having a real job or moving onwards and upwards permanently.

 

[PlumberSoCal2]

 

[Putthataway]

So northern lights goes from northern lights 2 then northern lights 5. What happened with northern lights 3 and 4?

 

[PlumberSoCal2]

My dog giving me a crazy side eyeView attachment 2220833