THE TRAINWRECK. Brought to you by thcfarrmer…..

[Greenadian]

Thank God you guys at Farm finally posted step by step guide to get on touch Lufthansa Airlines. Fuck its been a battle to get through to customer service!!!

 

[Captspaulding]

Here’s a lil slideshow of the Kahuna over the past 50 days. Extended veg time and I’m getting ready to flip soon. I moved her from the 1x3 to the 2x2 this evening. Lots of time in the grow this weekend.
View attachment 2409828
@Captspaulding check out what might be my new favorite plant.

At that rate alls i can say is,
Hide your wallet.

 

[Captspaulding]

Thank God you guys at Farm finally posted step by step guide to get on touch Lufthansa Airlines. Fuck its been a battle to get through to customer service!!!

Yep, its also nice to know that expedia

CAN BLOW ME WHERE THE PAMPERS IS

 

[Greenadian]

Be right back folks, just on a live chat with a fella and his thick Indian accent right now....giving him my credit card number and proving its really me with my social insurance number. He works for Bitcoin ATM and apparently they owe ME money. Pretty stoked

 

[Captspaulding]

Be right back folks, just on a live chat with a fella and his thick Indian accent right now....giving him my credit card number and proving its really me with my social insurance number. He works for Bitcoin ATM and apparently they owe ME money. Pretty stoked

Well color yourself lucky you leprechaun ass mofo.

 

[Captspaulding]

Ladies and gentlemen,
May i present david lee r…..
Err dr leonard rockstein.
Or
Dr rockso, the rock and roll clown.
He does cocaine.


Aint nothing like pulling into the drive thru at 3 am to order nothing but a straw.
Regardless, he spins a mean ballon bass.

He lives on my vest too
Of coarse he does.

 

[Captspaulding]

He lives on my vest too
Of coarse he does.

With pogo

 

[Captspaulding]

With pogo

Aaaand me

 

[Florida_Mike]

"@Captspaulding vs. the Cyber Bots”

 

[Captspaulding]

53 laps around the sun — and you're still glowing like the first flare at dawn.
May this orbit bring you laughter like thunder, peace like still water, and adventures that feel like stardust on bare feet.

You’re not getting older. You're just collecting gravity, mystery, and magic.

Happy birthday, SunshineSuperGirl — the universe shines a little brighter with you in it.

Aw sorry i missed this. Happy belated birfday!

 

[Florida_Mike]

Aaaand me

That's a bad ass vest right there sir!
I'd love to hear the stories that thing
could tell

 

[Justlovetogrow]

I celebrated my 53RD TRIP ROUND' THE SUN YESTERDAY with my BEST FRIEND. (Donald)
Born 4-2-1972 #CheeseCakeFactory

I missed this yesterday aswell happy birthday

 

[Captspaulding]

That's a bad ass vest right there sir!
I'd love to hear the stories that thing
could tell

Bro, for real,
The various beers it has sampled,
The many dna/blood samples from a multitude of sources.
If it could talk it would say either
“I quit” or “pls kill me”
I have had it for a loooooong time man.
Ill be buried in it

 

[Florida_Mike]

Bro, for real,
The various beers it has sampled,
The many dna/blood samples from a multitude of sources.
If it could talk it would say either
“I quit” or “pls kill me”
I have had it for a loooooong time man.
Ill be buried in it

Fucking awesome Bro! Book marked for future reference

 

[Captspaulding]

Fucking awesome Bro! Book marked for future reference

You wouldn’t be saying that if you could smell it

 

[Captspaulding]

Day 420

Ive been killing these unruly threads for a while now, lost track of what day of the week it is. Ive been drinking alot lately
Its just a sea of jet blue, expedia, ect.
Curses.
The lot of them.
After all these days it really sank in that its just not as satisfying killing these damned things if they cant feel the sheer brutality of my racket.
There was a time when the payoff was huge, there was toilet paper for all, sure maybe an addvert here or there, but it eventually like any well oiled machine of propaganda, i too had reservations for jet blue. They are just so damned accomadating…..all the smiles, the half a cola and bag of peanuts that was already open and before we all knew it, we too were posting about the savings.
Flying around in ignorant bliss
call jet blue yall and inquire,


Or tell them all to run into traffic.

 

[closettrapper217]

Yeesh.
Senior serve.
Its my youngest kids lasy year and they do this thing,
All the folks come for a dinner catered by “___” food joint and is served to you by a pack of well intentioned but overwhelmed by the moment semi-adult non server nimrods that top off your water/tea, 3000 times as you hang out for 2 1/2 hours wondering why everyone else has eaten all ready. And packing up to leave?

Oh hey. Kiddo?
So you gonna bring out some food, your granny is riding tough, but i think shes a bit peckish,


Ooooooh wooops
Ill be right back.
Fucking knucklehead.
Im laughing, wifey is less the. Enthusiastic.
Granny is strati g to “toot” those tiny soundless ones. You know what im talking about.
People are looking this direction and scowling. Glad they are leaving so the kid comes bumbling out legs aKimbo, arms shufflings trays plural laughing and shit.
Im not 1000% certain but im leaning in the direction some vape action may or may not have occurd here.


Call me crazy.



So heres the looooooong awaited meal.
Catered by “marios”
A 2 course meal of breaded chicken smimming in soupy noodles. I start to stand. And head for the table with the stacks of to go boxes i eyed earlier.
They were beckoning me. Never had styrofoam looked so sexy, aside from quick skims over napalm recipes, i digress, thats a story for another time, any how, i look at the resonably stoned kid of mine, who is now sporting bambi sized pupils with that face on the brink of tears
me- “aye young homie. Killer event! Great job! im sup…..”
My ridiculous kid- “hey pop, arentcha gonne eat that?!!!!”
i say “oh yeah, oh totally kid im sorry. Of coarse i will”
My possible retreat has been stifled.
With my options dwindling, escape is not an option.

What do clowns do best asshole?



They smile.


So i take a deepbreath, swallow the thick “toot” infused environment and start spinning my fork in a gaggle of noodly tendrils bolstered by a greasy spoon that at the right angle, was expressing my true feelings of scowl driven horror regret, as i eventually with zeal of coarse, hop that viscus amalgum of “food” haphazardly into my greasepaint covered yap.
“Mmmmmmmm” i mumble with my eye brows lifted as high as possible head shaking up and down looking like a doller store robert deniro squinty eyed expression we have all ckme tk know and love.

It isnt over.
is this kid literally gonna watch us eat the whole thing?

Well yeah.
He fucking did.
Of coarse he did.
My stomach was rad while it lasted
R.I.P.
Clown stomach
50bc (befoee clownz) 2025ad (after don cheadle)
it will be missed.

A beautifully worded story cap

 

[Bobcat.Branch]

A wave of filthy spam has hit the forums @Captspaulding

 

[Captspaulding]

A beautifully worded story cap

Thx man ,

It was funny all told.
Ridiculous.
A for effort all around too hahahaha.

 

[Florida_Mike]

This has got to be your cuz @Captspaulding