THE TRAINWRECK. Brought to you by thcfarrmer…..

[Captspaulding]

Yeah... THIS asshole.

 

[Florida_Mike]

Who else hates thieves?

 

[Mikedin]

The Japanese toilets, South Park

 

[Florida_Mike]

Main mission of my service mutts...
Protect Daddy's stash at all costs!

 

[ChairmanFester]

Main mission of my service mutts...
Protect Daddy's stash at all costs!

If they could only water on schedule...

 

[Captspaulding]

I’m tired of chasing my dreams. I’d rather find out where they’re going and catch up with them later.

 

[Captspaulding]

Main mission of my service mutts...
Protect Daddy's stash at all costs!

Right fucking on

 

[Mikedin]

Mother fucking fuckin woodwhacker

 

[ChairmanFester]

Sure! Here's a folk-style song in the storytelling tradition of Arlo Guthrie’s “City of New Orleans”, complete with lyrics and chords, telling the tale of a lonesome Russian cannabis grower, his beloved plant Masha, and an imaginary moose companion.

---

“Masha of the Midnight Sun”
By ?? (you!)
Capo 2nd fret (optional) – Key of G for a folksy Guthrie feel


pgsql
CopyEdit
[G] Riding through the snowdrifts out past [D] Omsk and Tomsk and Tyu[G]men,
In a [C] shack of rotted timber sits a [G] man with frozen [D] hands,
He's [G] warming up his tea beside a [D] cracked old kerosene [Em] lamp,
[C] Talking to his plants again, and [G] dreaming up a [D] plan...

[C] "Masha, you're a miracle, [G] sprouting in this land so cold,
[D] I gave you mammoth chromosomes and [Em] water from a troll,
[C] The moose agrees you're sacred, he [G] tells me every night,
[D] Dancing on the rooftops by the [C] borealis [G] light."

**Chorus:**
[G] Good mornin’ Masha, [C] how’s your chlorophyll today?
[G] Did the frostbite get your roots or did the [D] fungus go away?
[G] Yes I’m just a grower [C] with a dream and frozen toes,
[G] Singing to my sativa [D] where the arctic [G] zephyr blows.



Verse 2:


sql
CopyEdit
[G] He tried some vodka nutrient and [D] light from disco balls,
[C] Trained her in a spiral shape that [G] crept up all four [D] walls,
[G] The moose named *Yevgeny* swears she [D] whispers in the [Em] air,
[C] About THC and CBN and [G] quantum garden [D] care...

[C] "One leaf cures insomnia, one [G] calms a Cossack’s rage,
[D] One stem starts a polka band, the [Em] buds act like a sage.
[C] They'll never understand you, dear, they’ll [G] ban you till I’m dead—
[D] But you’re the only reason I’ve got [C] visions in my [G] head."

**(Repeat Chorus)**



Bridge: (spoken over softly strummed G and C chords, Guthrie-style)

“They laughed at me in Krasnoyarsk... said I was mad.
But who’s laughing now, eh Masha? The moose is! He always is…”

Final Chorus:
[G] Farewell sweet Masha, [C] my frost-defying friend,
[G] The KGB is knocking, but our [D] journey will not end.
[G] ‘Cause somewhere there’s a greenhouse [C] on a tundra bathed in blue,
[G] And a moose with big opinions [D] waitin’ there for [G] you...

 

[Ninjadogma]

And THIS asshole too. Haven't been able to check on the garden for 2 weeks, now I'm suspecting out of the seeds I popped a majority are dudes. Glad I popped 8 more on my way out the door 2 weeks ago when I first suspected a sausage fest. A little late in the season but I've got supplemental light to let them grow out a little.

 

[MartyMcFly42oh]

Sure! Here's a folk-style song in the storytelling tradition of Arlo Guthrie’s “City of New Orleans”, complete with lyrics and chords, telling the tale of a lonesome Russian cannabis grower, his beloved plant Masha, and an imaginary moose companion.

---

“Masha of the Midnight Sun”
By ?? (you!)
Capo 2nd fret (optional) – Key of G for a folksy Guthrie feel


pgsql
CopyEdit
[G] Riding through the snowdrifts out past [D] Omsk and Tomsk and Tyu[G]men,
In a [C] shack of rotted timber sits a [G] man with frozen [D] hands,
He's [G] warming up his tea beside a [D] cracked old kerosene [Em] lamp,
[C] Talking to his plants again, and [G] dreaming up a [D] plan...

[C] "Masha, you're a miracle, [G] sprouting in this land so cold,
[D] I gave you mammoth chromosomes and [Em] water from a troll,
[C] The moose agrees you're sacred, he [G] tells me every night,
[D] Dancing on the rooftops by the [C] borealis [G] light."

**Chorus:**
[G] Good mornin’ Masha, [C] how’s your chlorophyll today?
[G] Did the frostbite get your roots or did the [D] fungus go away?
[G] Yes I’m just a grower [C] with a dream and frozen toes,
[G] Singing to my sativa [D] where the arctic [G] zephyr blows.



Verse 2:


sql
CopyEdit
[G] He tried some vodka nutrient and [D] light from disco balls,
[C] Trained her in a spiral shape that [G] crept up all four [D] walls,
[G] The moose named *Yevgeny* swears she [D] whispers in the [Em] air,
[C] About THC and CBN and [G] quantum garden [D] care...

[C] "One leaf cures insomnia, one [G] calms a Cossack’s rage,
[D] One stem starts a polka band, the [Em] buds act like a sage.
[C] They'll never understand you, dear, they’ll [G] ban you till I’m dead—
[D] But you’re the only reason I’ve got [C] visions in my [G] head."

**(Repeat Chorus)**



Bridge: (spoken over softly strummed G and C chords, Guthrie-style)




Final Chorus:
[G] Farewell sweet Masha, [C] my frost-defying friend,
[G] The KGB is knocking, but our [D] journey will not end.
[G] ‘Cause somewhere there’s a greenhouse [C] on a tundra bathed in blue,
[G] And a moose with big opinions [D] waitin’ there for [G] you...

 

[Ninjadogma]

And THIS asshole too. Haven't been able to check on the garden for 2 weeks, now I'm suspecting out of the seeds I popped a majority are dudes. Glad I popped 8 more on my way out the door 2 weeks ago when I first suspected a sausage fest. A little late in the season but I've got supplemental light to let them grow out a little.

How them goddamn male plants are feeling right now...


Edit: Well my bad, apparently the brief titties on a trampoline part were unsuitable... It's the scene where Lebowsky is being chased by a dude with giant scissors who wants to cut off his balls.

 

[Ninjadogma]

My Durban S-2 next to a Banana OG clone that's starting to chunk up. Not gonna be room for her (Durban) in the screenhouse, gonna just have to let her go "commando" in the regular garden. Sitting in a 3 gallon now, up potting to 7 gal today. If she wants more root space I'm happy to oblige all the way to 30 gallon if I have to.

 

[ChairmanFester]

My Durban S-2 next to a Banana OG clone that's starting to chunk up. Not gonna be room for her (Durban) in the screenhouse, gonna just have to let her go "commando" in the regular garden. Sitting in a 3 gallon now, up potting to 7 gal today. If she wants more root space I'm happy to oblige all the way to 30 gallon if I have to.

Those fan leaves can be worn as a shirt lol.

 

[closettrapper217]

Anyone watch this show? Started it at season one the other night and it’s fuckin hilarious lol

 

[MartyMcFly42oh]

How them goddamn male plants are feeling right now...


Edit: Well my bad, apparently the brief titties on a trampoline part were unsuitable... It's the scene where Lebowsky is being chased by a dude with giant scissors who wants to cut off his balls.

We’re going to cut off your chonsen lewbowski

 

[MartyMcFly42oh]

Anyone watch this show? Started it at season one the other night and it’s fuckin hilarious lol

Baby Billy’s bible bonkers Danny McBride and Walton Googins are to comedy, like peanut butter and chocolate are to candy. That show is awesome, if you haven’t watched it I recommend it 10/10 times.

 

[Florida_Mike]

Baby Billy’s bible bonkers Danny McBride and Walton Googins are to comedy, like peanut butter and chocolate are to candy. That show is awesome, if you haven’t watched it I recommend it 10/10 times.

No HBO. Will just have to wait until netflix gets it...

 

[Captspaulding]

And THIS asshole too. Haven't been able to check on the garden for 2 weeks, now I'm suspecting out of the seeds I popped a majority are dudes. Glad I popped 8 more on my way out the door 2 weeks ago when I first suspected a sausage fest. A little late in the season but I've got supplemental light to let them grow out a little.

If you’re interested in pollen, you know, I usually wait until about a week or two after I see balls and then I toss them outside. Why at the times they’ll drop pollen way before the mutation will fully take hold reverting them back to veg so you should still be able to get something out of it at the end of the day

 

[Captspaulding]

No HBO. Will just have to wait until netflix gets it...

Yo, they were great in vice principles too, dude but I fuck with the goddamn gemstones