ur holidays r over so i can jack em up. ain't a self pity thing so... keep reading and of course, it's off topic.
the last blood family member of g's mother's gen, died on dec 23... hence the cancellation of a commercial xmas.
my niece (never met her, still), is in the hospital, with staph infection, internally, for at least 2 wks. my neighbor and good friends: he did not return the man he left, after falling, with internal injuries. he may never be so.
life is providing "balance".
i wrote to the wife of g's uncle, who passed. I'd heard she'd just had the hardest week of her life.
people forgot how solitary; how lonely it can be, when you're watching the vitals of a loved one, in the hospital and it intrigued me, to hear that was how she felt... that the loss of her husband, was the hardest week of her life.
ever lose a job? ever lose one under false pretenses? had a company u love, shut its doors, forever? your own? ever been divorced? pfft... ever kept a marriage, together? raised a child?
it's interesting that when something awesome is happening to one, one may want that feeling to last, forever and yet those moments can seem so fleeting.
when something terrible, tragic, or generally unappreciated happens.... when one feels loss... fear... uncertainty... do those moments, not seem to last, forever? how many times have you worried about finances? economies? can ya count em? do you remember how often? how many loved ones have you lost? watched suffer? can you count them?
it reminded me of what's really important and that while horrible moments suck... they're temporary. we're all, temporary... what's going to last longer? the loved ones, under your roof, or the stones n dust, under your roof?
so the good stuff, like trying to squeeze a handful of sand... look down... it's still there, even though, seemingly fleeting and you remember it, well... all the good, particles. all the cumbersome particles that feel like it lasts, forever, when ur tryin to wash it outta ur swimsuit... u won't even remember how many grains... how many times and eventually, it all washes away.
thought I'd robbed it from prince of Persia movie... then, i found the first paragraph, of 200 yr old desert:
Every night and every morn Some to misery are born. Every morn and every night Some are born to sweet delight. Some are born to sweet delight, Some are…
www.poetryfoundation.org
for g's aunt... it just means that every day, going forward, will b gravy; hard part's over... by her words. and if u feel similarly... everything else should b a breeze, for u. don't try to hold on to the kwrap in ur undershorts: let it go...
