DETOXING OFF OPIOIDS; NO MEDICINAL VALUE CCO / RSO

[SPARECHANGE]

Maybe it's me

I'm just kookoo and a poet at heart

Tok
I
C

 

[SPARECHANGE]

The diox difference varies greatly

It's not a clean controlled environment

Some days the flaps r open longer

It's easily 40% n above

But varies from grow to grow

Even less than when the plant midgets on me. And even makes the 40% a lie

Subjectively

Because I never compared 8" midgets

Only the bugs

As to my bigs

25% is a lie

And bad

Published intel

They clearly didn't confirm

Depending on context

 

[SPARECHANGE]

Bout a qp per tank vs a pound...

 

[SPARECHANGE]

Well aware of the percentage diffs

I'm being conservative

 

[SPARECHANGE]

I'm not growing now

I'm not looking into mediums n nutez

I'm locking into helping med n his wife

Parkinson's

Opioid damage

What books r we reading today

News tv shows

I'm only reading about helping others

What ur Saturday lookin like

 

[SPARECHANGE]

If I wanted what 99% of what u grow

I'd get it cheaper in clinic shake

Only I'd require less cheaper

And

The cocktails would b stronger

Than 100% of ur best



I know cause here's what my teepee looks like

Means I can walk away from a >20k$

Investment with zero regrets

Because once I do better than the rest

What's left to prove

I can buy cheaper for g

Put my spin on it

N have more time

For med n his mrs

Cause the smartest grower I know

Has questions for me

He requires my time

Has always given freely of hiz

And I suspect I'll b having these convos the rest of my life

Sooo

I've no time to grow

And yes

Sir maam

I do better than ewe

 

[SPARECHANGE]

Told u bitchez I felt I was repairing opioids damage...

 

[SPARECHANGE]

Medical Marijuana for Leukemia - Marijuana Doctors

www.marijuanadoctors.com

And they keep dicking with individual terps n cultivars

Genius

Throw em all in assholes so 30yrs from now when mice feel better and Walgreens pimps it losing our tax, "benefits"... when my town has no high school no kindergarten

Well have been giving em all to u recreationally in a customized dose at 50000% tax n walking right over the dea data and money grubbing whores that r healthcare our gvt and the current cannabis industry

Terpenes: What Are Terpenoids And What Do They Do?

Terpenes are a large class of organic hydrocarbons produced by medical marijuana plants, and are referred to as terpenoids when denatured by oxidation

www.medicaljane.com

Y the fuck would u not toss it all in n lean to personal preference

 

[SPARECHANGE]

Now see

This Harvard lacky got 4mil 6 yrs ago

And I've taught more in one fucking week

Piece of shit Harvard quacklacky

Pfft 4mil

If he'd have worked harder

He'd have received 10figs for his efforts

Idiot

6 fucking yrs old this study

I learned absolutely nothing from his fucking millions

Piece of shit

Getting by on another 50 cent name

Harvard

I do better for the farm

Than any of their paid peeps

N Harvard gets millions for dick

Lovely

And I'm the unemployed loser

Nice

Cannabis and the Brain

neuro.hms.harvard.edu

 

[Chad.Westport]

Hope you are doing well buddy.

 

[SPARECHANGE]

As I read this

I see different perspectives which lead to these behaviors

We're all similar

Yet we're all different

Shrinks see nothing new today

We r similar

And yet

We r unique

Some require more of whatever from elements to diets to possession to

Chemical imbalances

To life events

Which hard code us for who we will become

Pot effects everyone differently

We drink because we r thirsty

Eat of hunger

Self medicate by instinct for sanity survival and our own personal balance

This theory based on my life experience

I took on vices when I was... nudged

Molestation

Smoking

Not a mind for science art english at that age

Beating restricted over my mind not prepared to b a rocket scientist as truck driver material

An independent thinker

Not a ewe

I learned forgery

To camouflage elude detection

Ace tests skip homework

Skip school

Avoid detection

Avoid trouble

Survival skills

And as the others I surfed with drank from time to time

Social acceptance as a child taught not being a brain surgeon at 12 warranted an uncle trying to fuck me and that's perfectly normal so y would I want to escape

Just good common sense

I didn't slit my fucking wrists

That would make me smarter than ewe

Who attended class to get those grades that required no homework

And still never took ap courses

Never took college courses in fucking grade school

And dropped out.

Lived the life

Dancers

High en hookers

Truck stop hookers

Swinging partying

Whatever ur hedonistic dreams

I live my fucking dreams

Everything has a cost


So when I read this bullshit

From a pc judgemental perspective

I c blind people throwing shit at a wall

Holding answers while asking the question they hold the answers toooo!

Fuk!

Chemicals in the brain

Imbalancece

What common elements keep checking every single box they ask these questions about

Pot!

The keys to every fucking lock they keep complaining about

And since they continue to study with watered down ass

It's fucking easier to blindly detect the nuances of shit

When u locking at transatlantic cable in an American standard hace in mehico vs smelling a fart to find out peanuts have protein and he should've chewed that fucking corn better

Unfucking believable!

It ain't about the fucking high!

Simply righting a few wongs!

Notice instinct prevalent between the linez

They let em pick their poison...

Marijuana use: neuroscience perspective

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

The Neuroscience of Marijuana

The neuroscience of cannabis has advanced at a remarkable pace. While its a complicated story, the basic effec

pro.psychcentral.com

 

[SPARECHANGE]

Hope you are doing well buddy.

Yup

In a funk, but doin good ty

Howz trix

Let's get u high today

Everybody does it

Whatcha got

When would u need to b not psychotic by? How's Tuesday for u?

I need to focus to retain this shyt

Nobody up at one

If we get hi alone

We have a drug problem

I have enough problems

Letz get hi

Together



She's patterning out

1 meth every two days

4 oxies a day

She's feeling like a failure and instead of saying

Madman get me spinning

She says she's good

A lil tummy cramp from time to time

If she were honest n disclose

I feel like shyt

I'd dose her into the ground

Or outer space

It's addict behavior

She'll tell when I ask

But

Not before she takes a pill

We are pleased

It's success

It's tapering

But

Now she's stagnant bout 4 days

Hence the shame

She cannot view this as failure

She needs to b honest

I need to stop n focus n stay home

N dance with my girl n twirl her brain

If pain were the cause

I'd have suggested an orgasm next

This is the beast

I'm going to launch her ass at dawn

And we goin party

During a taper

She's still a woman

Something will magically b there in 13 days

I don't have to count her pillz

We just kinda know

She likes happy now

I like happy when appropriate

Hopefully I'm happy tomorrow n rest of my life

If not

I probably should play ahead n never remain stagnant during a fucking taper

Common fucking sense

U goin run out n blame me or suck dick for it

So

We taper now r never

U made a fucking Choice

Own it r I'm out

You'll lose the house n car

And I'll simply buy another

This

Is how we cover

Probabilities n outcomes

In the morning

We speak on our knees

And paint a pretty picture for the beast

The Fucking reality of thingz

Only

With finesse n tact

Perhaps a volunteer?

It's not my forte

 

[SPARECHANGE]

I will count her pills with her

Like a fucking 2yr old

And draw a stick figure calendar

And say baby

U been down to 1 meth for two days twice now

U have fuk day did she go to cali

Let's say mmm

Friday

50 exits

40 left

6 days

Yup

Bout where she'd b

I better start that stick figure calendar

N consider packing

Some folks lack the ability to c beyond the moment

Anyone lookin for a roommate

 

[SPARECHANGE]

Too late

The beast was awake

I suggested she do a count

When I said 20 days she said right

What's 15x6

What's today

How many of 90

Does the beast have left

Let's assume

One week

The beast sayz

I knew she'd need something n I agreed

Riiight

So go through ur oxies

N back to cutting methadone n half, complaining about kidney pain

I said look

We all know my pills r gone cause we know u took em

U ain't gotta say nothin

And u chose this

I didn't

I'll map out a plan for u

I did it in 2 wks

So can ewe

But as far as my knowing her needs

Yeah

She took those 3x over

Now

And never stockpiled n came up short

N I'll report her doctor

To the media over this bullshit n leave on my own

She chose

It's her future

She puts her back into it now

Or she can have the future I don't chose

 

[SPARECHANGE]

I will apologize to penny today.

Penny has lied to me

Said she forgave me

Didn't

Bore a very specific grudge

Ginger told me

I not only counted my opioids n locked em up...

Without misplacing anything n my own home.

We behave as if...

Ginger for the third time, did exactly what she did the first two times: found where I stashed the key and took my pills. We know this because it's in her nature to do so, twice over, previously... and then, lie about it because where will she go.

I will go to neighbor penny, to apologize, yet again. Remember... penny loves me and she is angry n hurt, allegedly...
Penny's n my versions of love n integrity are in opposition.
Actually considered asking her here. It's unlikely she'll see beyond her own feelings and no doubt, won't end well.

Imginger never told her about the knife...
And the way I will confirm, is by apologizing for lying about a butcher knife.... if she accepts my apology, yet again... we'll know 1... penny doesn't accept apologies so nothing ventured nothing gained... taken aback is an appropriate response only if ginger told about the knife. Self righteous n hostile is only the beginning of a response from her, to confirm ginger never told er. She'd b confused to hear me apolitical for something ginger took responsibility for.
I numbered my bottle caps with pill counts. She left the empties as thieves in a hurry, don't do... she just didn't look. Misery didn't require penguins n hairz...
What we will confirm today to the nth degree will just confirm what I know... to b fair... ginger is willing to lie to a loved one. We love penny...
I have a thing for integrity.

So as the pill conversation has been completed around 0100

And she expects me to address it, today so she's had time to prepare for combat

Y would I need to address her pills, again

I'm not going to stick around for nightly methadone splitting with med friends on the end of a line... it's a phone, not a scaffold with a noose

Nope... she has a week... essentially...

I did warn her... it's her future and she'll lose it if she doesn't put her back into it

And she will if she fails

Not counting, planning n assuming lalala something of my choosing will b there

That's not trying

That's more of the same

That's taking advantage

It's her life

She's only viewing as her next pill

It ain't a good

U don't get to lie to share my bed

So we won't discuss a pill count today

Y would I

She thought about it all night

It's about time she considered responsibility

And if she thought about how to manipulate me all night

It's exactly what I needed to plan my next step

Either direction

A week out

We'll do minimal fact checking

Because we know

But

Ya gotta b fair so I'll waste 5min visiting a beloved neighbor

Confirming what she'll never notice; never hear

N then I'll check inventories n plan her success

It's my 2week investment too

But I have an exit strategy

Entirely prepared

I've insured

All she spent the night thinking about was me n manipulation

As is the beasts way

Know y the bank won't take my house

Addicts r too fucking lazy to do paperwork

That's not y I don't do paperwork

Not a choice for me

I touch ink to paper

It looks like a child caught a 72 hr chicken turrets scratch fever

With stick figure caulkbukawwwk

 

[SPARECHANGE]

All I did was sleep my typical 4 hrs

N the only thing n my mind was my focus so I woke up to a plan

Vs staying awake to make one

Perhaps another perk from this poopoo

I'll look out for overnight plans drawn by subconscious, again

See if it's a "coincidence" I don't believe in anymore

Or a new toy to b explored

 

[SPARECHANGE]

5hrs

Guess I slept in

The background noise is

As predicted

No propane

No heat

Told momz I'd planned this shyt

She saved credit... take me 3mo to complete

Y would I need er to

I know it inside out n have a flawless history besides 2mo... going into g's intervention (urgh and a cali thing from divorce)

Now, what's the weather like

Doesn't bother me none

If I wanted to

I'd put my camping shower out

I take cold showers to meditate

Got blankets

The hamies donned my seedling mat

Y would I need a year's worth of propane if she could lose the hizzy

I won't get my credit

Trust me...

They find a way...

Sooo... g's bitch about no hot water no food no cooking

There's an entire roast with everything

Awaiting a slow cooker

The microwave isn't broke

This is myopia my friends

I'm dealing with the beast

Car has fuel her food stamps are juiced and

She chose to spend sentiment on smokes

I have no problem abandoning her Tucson bullshit at this time

She's had smokes for a year

Bout what a prebuy costs

Only she spent 20$ to confirm this for me

She had toilet paper

I didn't

So we know going in

We give her choices of scale she can quantify

2 packs of smokes for a $20 tip I gave Larry the roofer a year ago

He never spent it n gave it to me, when he thought I needed it

I just let g choose

She chose smokes

So y would I bend over backwards for a Tucson problem over sentimentality
When whatever I rescue for her will b lost to ashes n winds

I'm just waking up

Planning to make my girl coffee

N eggs n pancakes just to make her wonder how

I hope she slept well

I know I did

Days go by faster n faster

Don't they

Oil change if wind dies

Something else I'm forgetting

Meh

I'll figure it out

I can't wait to see the smile on my loves face

Btw

Before she was distracted with pills

She was saying something about how much smarter she feels

I'm paraphrasing here

She ain't wrong

But as far as the coffee is concerned

Imma lose that battle today

I could use a cup

Sooner than she'll b aware

I just planned my next 60 days

100x over

I hope she got her beauty sleep

I know I dreamed about the future

Very cool

 

[SPARECHANGE]

Up texting late ain't her style

She don't have the 24/7 policy I do

I gave er the master

Gave er privacy

Only a couple people she knows r available at those hrs

Shame

Means she planned her exit last night

With a gal who never comes through

Wish she'd simply slept

Sigh... ain't giving up

Less she fix the end

If she sticks it out

Pays off for everyone

They have to choose it

N then

They have to stick it out

Whether with me or some other food a day or decades from now

I hope she sees withdrawal doesn't have to suck

N perhaps pulls it off or... is less fearful of trying again, once we get it on a shelf

She's my focus

Until she chooses not to b

The lies

The brain doesn't know the difference

Her behavior is enough

My first test with an addict who chose

 

[SPARECHANGE]

Her vitals tell a story

She steals pills to save her from the stroke territory they actually put her in

Life can b similarly cyclical

If we don't change course

The lying

That's a choice

We gonna confirm quietly with neighbor just to never falsely accuse if at all possible

And we already have just cause

But it's my girl

I'm human too

Give er a fair shake

Plan for the worst

N if it works n I'm sayin yes to her a year from now

I'll b pleasantly surprised and entirely unprepared

Planning for a dream

Is a waste of time

They don't always come true

But it's a pleasant surprise

Not an inconvenience

When they come true

So y ruin a surprise by planning for what may never happen

I could die tomorrow

And she'll remember I brought coffee n eggs n pancakes

When they're impossible n her mind

Let's give the ol cow a lil hope injection this morning

Just because it seems impossible

Doesn't mean I don't camp in style

 

[SPARECHANGE]

So we set traps

No need to c penny

She finally admitted to stealing my dope and lying

Naturally

It's all my fault

I left her alone for a year

Hmmm

Doin what

Paying for her

The research

The charity work

One way or another

My focus always her how to...
Xxx whatever her needs

Admitted codependent

I embrace what I am

Not try to b something I'm not

So a year

From her lips

Begins with a day one

Which day was that

Because I had more than enough for 6 mo if she took it a year after my journey began

That's September 1, 2020

I'd started with calmer shit

She kept redirecting to her current pill predicament

And I told er

I've lied to u one time this entire relationship and it was rather recent

Having to do with ur intervention

I've never stolen from u

So between the people in this house currently

It's my word we'll b trusting

If she took it a year ago

Regardless of when or the truth

I don't have to b in the room to know what happened

Obviously

Just human nature

What doesn't occur to her

Is

I don't blame her

At all

Now she's informed me she's spoken to her doc and it's not her doc specifically

But 1. It proves they still got the message

And this time I'll look at her appointment card

Her doc thinks it's funny

Lmfao

Because they haven't been acquainted with me

People tell u their weakness

If u listen

When they feel entitled to rub ur face n shit

Imagine the stress on her heart for a year

Knowing I'd kick her to the curb for it

Only now

I made a commitment

Knowing what she did

Still no apology

It ain't required

I just saw the beast

I did mention today would b rough for her

Told er but she didn't hear

We always get

U don't know my pain

She's right

But she ain't willing to lick burnt poodle white diarrhea n that all I need to know

She's doin exactly as I said

Next pill strategy

An exit plan

Told er

Ain't given up

So unless ur quitting

N I got threats naturally

No quit because she still has pills n pot

Told er

Thing is baby

U have enough pills for a week and you'll b out of oxy

Someone is still lying

I've reported her daily doses here

Yesterday was 4 & 1...

Stagnant 4 days

She told me she had 80 oxy

Even based on her regular script

By today

At best she went monday that's 75 she'd have

But every day

No less than 4

I remember 6

And possibly even an 8 oxy day

We can assume

She's lying

She's saying see

U don't respect me

It just slipped

Because you're a fucking liar

Means she sleeps with me for drugs

Based on my history my perspective put plainly

Another crack whore

She didn't choose it for herself

Her funny lol pain doc did

I'm just doing my civic duty

To report her doctor to the police now

And

The Washington post

Any after shocks for ginger are her own design

U want the life of a thief and a liar

It has a cost

I should know

She'll probably b left alone

The doctor will b scrutinized

Not my problem

Apparently they think it's funny

Whatever happens

Now

I do

C
I
Two
O
C



So...

Besides the noise

She's already planned a refill

I pointed out

It's a long ways off

We'll continue this conversation at a more appropriate time

She needs to know

She splits a methadone

I'm out

She'll lose everything

I won't

She's so close

Do not give up

I'm not finished

She's angry n self righteous

Nobody likes how they look naked

I do

I love touching my bad places

I'm used to it

If u want to win

It's how u always roll