"going Illegal"- funny

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LBH

LBH

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FORMS ARE GOING FAST- SIGN UP TODAY!

Becoming Illegal (Actual letter from an Iowa resident and sent to his senator)

The Honorable Tom Harkin
731 Hart Senate Office Building
Phone (202) 224 3254
Washington DC , 20510

Dear Senator Harkin,

As a native Iowan and excellent customer of the Internal Revenue Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted the Department of Homeland Security in an effort to determine the process for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you.

My primary reason for wishing to change my status from U.S. Citizen to illegal alien stems from the bill which was recently passed by the Senate and for which you voted. If my understanding of this bill's provisions is accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the United States for five years, all I need to do to become a citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine and income taxes for three of the last five years. I know a good deal when I see one and I am anxious to get the process started before everyone figures it out.

Simply put, those of us who have been here legally have had to pay taxes every year so I'm excited about the prospect of avoiding two years of taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way that I can apply to be illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent result for me and my family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and 2005.

Additionally, as an illegal alien I could begin using the local emergency room as my primary health care provider. Once I have stopped paying premiums for medical insurance, my accountant figures I could save almost $10,000 a year.

Another benefit in gaining illegal status would be that my daughter would receive preferential treatment relative to her law school applications, as well as 'in-state' tuition rates for many colleges throughout the United States for my son.

Lastly, I understand that illegal status would relieve me of the burden of renewing my driver's license and making those burdensome car insurance premiums. This is very important to me given that I still have college age children driving my car.

If you would provide me with an outline of the process to become illegal (retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms, I would be most appreciative. Thank you for your assistance.

Your Loyal Constituent,
Donald Ruppert
Burlington , IA

Get your Forms (NOW)!! Call your Internal Revenue Service 1-800-289-1040.

Please pass this on to your friends so they can save on this great offer
 
genepool

genepool

303
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Excellent post bro, god I wish the troops would come home & secure the borders. Also Cannabis was legal & all the hard working American citizens stop getting screwed by the politics of illegal immigration over & over & over again. while the borders are totally open!!!
 
Venom818

Venom818

3,303
263
Excellent post bro, god I wish the troops would come home & secure the borders. Also Cannabis was legal & all the hard working American citizens stop getting screwed by the politics of illegal immigration over & over & over again. while the borders are totally open!!!


LMAO troops cant secure shit bro get real
 
GanjaGardener

GanjaGardener

848
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I didn't realize that llegal aliens and unemployed citizens had so much in common.
 
B

bluemaco

15
0
Lol, hilarious! I'm from the UK so things are a bit different but it's a good time to be an illegal over here right now, lol.
 
markscastle

markscastle

Well-Known Farmer
4,825
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I understand the most used first name in the UK is now Mohamid,I`d be worried if I were anywhere in the UK!
 
4

420king-MASSES

1,504
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what if we go out to international waters jump on a banana boat and come in with some cubans would that work
 
E

Easyrasta

Guest
you forgot the priviledge of being round up, tortured, held in jail then deported.
 
GanjaGardener

GanjaGardener

848
63
Where do you go to get on board? Is there a sign-up sheet somewhere?
 
GanjaGardener

GanjaGardener

848
63
As are useless comments.....
:giggleDitto and Bravo! :clapping Maybe somebody should start a useless crap thread. It would give people who post useless crap a place to hang out.
 
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