How many 5 year olds can you take on before getting your ass kicked?

  • Thread starter Cat Jockey
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Cat Jockey

Cat Jockey

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Okay. I can't take credit for it and don't know if where I saw it was an original thought/post but I came across it either at OG or PG, even servers go down in the WoD.

How many 5 y.o. you think you could take on at one time before they kick your ass? 5? 10? 15? 25? More? There is a limit, make no mistake when my ass would get flat the fuck out overwhelmed by and I would get the shit beat out of me by a bunch of 5 year old little ankle biters. There are only so many 45 lb. little punks you can kick in the teeth, punch in the back of the head, etc., before your ass is down and those little shits pull some Lilliputian shit on your now prone Gulliver ass.

Seriously, how many 5 y.o. ya think you can handle?

(Of course I do not condone kicking 5 y.o. in the teeth or punching them in the back of the head.








It is much easier to just whack 'em with a baseball bat like a baby seal) ;)
 
C

CAPO

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WTF...................................I think...mmmm....350-400.

They would have to be jacked up on Rockstar and SourWarheads though.
 
D

Donk Frog

Guest
LMAO........Ill take them ALL...fuckin ninja superstar here :)
 
J

jordisgarden

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My son is in pop warner footbal. i took the ball from one end zone to the other and i used about 40 of em as a bridge to get there. i fucked these little buzzards up. i had my sneaker on the face of one as i stiff armed the next little maggot into the dirt. it was like stomping ants only a lot more crunch when you step on them. boot to the eye. stepp on the face. stiff arm to the head. 8 year olds cry sooo easy...little pussies...lol jk. but i did stomp em. with no mercy. you could have 25 more with with kids that small you can actually use one as the club to beat the rest of em
 
0

0MEGA

Guest
:animbong:
as many as you can get together!
wow that sounds so fucking fun.
talk about releasing tension:icon_stick man:
i mean it wouldnt take much to get like 10-15 5 year old off of you,
Id probably punch one use him as a gaurd and rush the rest hahah.

This actually reminds me of one time i was at Mcdonalds when i was like 15 and my friend was on shrooms we went to the playroom and about 6-7 little ghetto kids start attacking us in there calling us "rocknroller guy " thier parents were just watching not doing shit,and in one of the tubes like 3 of them were just blabbering nonsense and one grabs my foot and fucking bites it like hes trying to eat it,i kicked hard out of reflex and threw those 3 so far back and booked after they cried.

also i was in the wrong neighboor hood.
 
Tripsick

Tripsick

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Standard 5 Years olds? Do they come armed or just sharp finger nails? or more Zombie, Zerg mentality 5 year olds you know midget strength and all?
im mean sure just stepping on them could wipe most of them out... but the massive rush and then exertion of energy... if they were in the 1000s there may be an issue with stamina... i mean sure you can fuck up a truck load but after say 15 to 30 mins a of non stop rush it may get a little difficult..:bong2:
 
T

theherbalizor

Premium Member
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Suppose it depends on their country of origin.

I wouldn't think it would take many Albanian or Somalian kids to give me a proper kicking... Not being racist here, they just be some double hard bastards. Not scared to wield a knife or two. Or perhaps even an AK.

What a bizarrely strange but yet comical thread.
 
convex

convex

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Just one ...

Years ago when I was a burner technician, a families youngster was watching me fix his burner. I had just finished changing an ignition transformer (10K volts across the electrodes) When I received the full force of the transformer across my knees - the little bastard was at the stairs flipping the switch back on as I writhed in pain - L'il prick!
 
soopy

soopy

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I'm with Herb on this one. you cant underestimate those little fingers though, f'n daggers! Awesome thread!
 
TheCoolestMan

TheCoolestMan

Premium Member
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theherbalizor said:
Suppose it depends on their country of origin.

I wouldn't think it would take many Albanian or Somalian kids to give me a proper kicking... Not being racist here, they just be some double hard bastards. Not scared to wield a knife or two. Or perhaps even an AK.

What a bizarrely strange but yet comical thread.
Click to expand...

20 fat macdonald american lil bastard would be easier to angle than 20 HUNGRY lil somalian mofo's aha...they will be like bloody zombies after ur ass
 
H

haze89

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Yo i'd stomp out 5 year olds all day everyday man. Do they come in waves or just a storm of the little fuckers? I'd kick a hole right in a five year old yo. Done right there. Gonna havta buy me some new shoessssss. lololol.
 
Cat Jockey

Cat Jockey

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I'm tellin' some of you tough guys, I think once you start getting around 20, you might have problems.

I'm talking some seriously pissed of 45 pound balls of fury. Hanging all over you, biting scratching, kicking, wiping boogers on you, the whole nine yards.

I'm thinking I might be able to take on a couple dozen at once, but even if I am swinging on of the little bastards around by the ankles knickin' other 5 y.o., you throw more than 25 or so at me at once and I think I am fucked.
 
F

Fred

Premium Member
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I cracked a bunch of people up with this today! Even if they looked at me wierd at first it always ended with laughing. I bout rolled in the floor when Capo said 350-400...all of it really funny.

That's my number too. 25 lazy fat 5 year old americans though. I'll bring some twinkies and take em down!
 
7

7rayos

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Let's try a bit of maths. No man can stay longer than 24 awake and be active unless he's on drugs. On really really good drugs, i mean, like a special thai sativa or something. Say, you can smash down a 5 year old with a single punch. At the beggining you could smash one every second or even two if using the legs, but after half an hour like this you're exhausted, so you have to take it with patience and smash a five-year-old every five seconds in order to be able to smash kids non-stop for 24 hours not letting too many close to you. That's a real feat, i'm talking a proper non-smoking killer. So, 12 kids a minute, 720 an hour, 17.240 in a whole day.
Not me, i like children and would waste too much time considering the consequences, remorse and the like for the wee bastards.
 
M

Malachi

Guest
I think it all depends on how fast you tire out ... I mean you could spin kick them in the head with furry, but how many spin kicks until you are winded and on your back gasping for air and those little punks would be all over you trying to gouge your eyes out
 
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