Personal Bank Account Closed! Wtf?

[GreenThumbBill]

I got a letter from my bank today stating that they are discontinuing the relationship due to unsatisfactory account history. I've heard about a shitload of dispensary owners making fairly large regular cash deposits getting shut down, but I'm just a lil guy. I have had an account with this fairly small regional bank for 5 years now and I usually make just one $2400-2800 monthly deposit. I have never made a deposit larger than 4k. I have never had an overdraft fee, I have never written a bad check.

Nobody including senior management will elaborate for me what "unsatisfactory account history" actually means.

Has this happened to anybody else in a similar situation? Anybody have an insightful clue as to what unsatisfactory account history actually means, why this happened and/or know how to prevent it in the future?

 

[diamond2.0]

That's unfortunate . Good question !

 

[DemonTrich]

Fuck banks

 

[mack 10]

they want you in debt.
they can't make money off you otherwise.

 

[MRLUCKYLEAF]

I got a letter from my bank today stating that they are discontinuing the relationship due to unsatisfactory account history. I've heard about a shitload of dispensary owners making fairly large regular cash deposits getting shut down, but I'm just a lil guy. I have had an account with this fairly small regional bank for 5 years now and I usually make just one $2400-2800 monthly deposit. I have never made a deposit larger than 4k. I have never had an overdraft fee, I have never written a bad check.

Nobody including senior management will elaborate for me what "unsatisfactory account history" actually means.

Has this happened to anybody else in a similar situation? Anybody have an insightful clue as to what unsatisfactory account history actually means, why this happened and/or know how to prevent it in the future?

Pickle barrels work pretty good..... The dirt won't get in it..... Hahaha

 

[GreenThumbBill]

Finally talked to somebody in senior management with the balls to tell me the real story. They claim my money smells like marijuana and they could not locate my federal tax report to confirm my income source. Oh well, fuck em. At least they aren't reporting me to chexsystems so I will be able to open another account somewhere else.

Are there any good national banks that aren't such nazis about this thing we do?

 

[LocalGrowGuy]

Finally talked to somebody in senior management with the balls to tell me the real story. They claim my money smells like marijuana and they could not locate my federal tax report to confirm my income source. Oh well, fuck em. At least they aren't reporting me to chexsystems so I will be able to open another account somewhere else.

Are there any good national banks that aren't such nazis about this thing we do?

That sucks.
I can attest that more banks don't like your money than do. I know at least two Colorado banks who threw their MMC accounts out, for the exact same reason, that the money stinks like marijuana. Although I like the smell, some people don't, and at the end of the day if your bank doesn't want your smelly bills they don't have to take them or do business with you. I appreciate the literal stinky situation you are in, but I think it's understandable if the reason they gave you is that your dolla dolla bills smell funny. Be glad you aren't in Kansas or Utah, you'll get arrested for pot if you make eye contact.

Can't you hire a stripper to make those deposits? I bet Mr. BankManager wouldn't mind as much then...

 

[MRLUCKYLEAF]

The stripper idea is what's up

 

[xavier7995]

Eh, at least you got your answer. Febreeze that cash man. I think you would probably be better off with a credit union or local bank. National banks have pretty strict rules on that stuff and are not going to be at all interested in looking the other way to secure your business. Credit unions may have more flexibility, but I have no clue really.

Dude...literally laundering your cash would be a good idea.

 

[scoop]

We tend to forget that everything we own smells like weed. I had the local Post Office jumping hard one day when i walked in after a trimming sesh and didn't think about how good I smelled...

Took me a sec to figure out that >I< was the cause of the freak out...but they were talking to each other frantically behind the counter "Someone has a package with weed in it...be on the lookout"....

Since i wasn't mailing weed...i just stood there...reeking...and fucked with their heads...LOL. As far as I know it isn't illegal to smell like fresh trimmed bud.....heehee...

Made me want to take a fresh bud down and shove it behind one of those BIG package lockers just to watch em squirm...know what I'm sayin'?

but "cash"..... damn....that's serious. The trail is too easily followed if they can look for your non-existent (?) fed income tax statement/personal info with THAT connection in mind...legal state or not...it >isn't legal to deal pot/have an income and not pay taxes/etc.. Danger Will Robinson....danger....

 

[GrowGod]

Next time wash your cash in clothes washer first..

 

[LocalGrowGuy]

We tend to forget that everything we own smells like weed. I had the local Post Office jumping hard one day when i walked in after a trimming sesh and didn't think about how good I smelled...

Took me a sec to figure out that >I< was the cause of the freak out...but they were talking to each other frantically behind the counter "Someone has a package with weed in it...be on the lookout"....

Since i wasn't mailing weed...i just stood there...reeking...and fucked with their heads...LOL. As far as I know it isn't illegal to smell like fresh trimmed bud.....heehee...

Made me want to take a fresh bud down and shove it behind one of those BIG package lockers just to watch em squirm...know what I'm sayin'?

but "cash"..... damn....that's serious. The trail is too easily followed if they can look for your non-existent (?) fed income tax statement/personal info with THAT connection in mind...legal state or not...it >isn't legal to deal pot/have an income and not pay taxes/etc.. Danger Will Robinson....danger....

I'd slam the brakes, jack the e and flip a bitch straight the fuck outta that place. If they gave you your money you are lucky. Even cash deposits under ridiculous amounts like ten or twenty grand will garner you attention, and not the good kind. If a bank looked for your federal tax return to verify your income as it relates to your cash deposits with them, then I would stop doing business with them yesterday. I think fighting to keep your money there is not the best play. X is right, launder that shit. Or plan B, which is strippers, blow, condoms and plan b the pill.

 

[xavier7995]

It isn't really a large amount of cash you are dealing with. You might want to Google up some options regarding casinos nearby, gambling income is legit. You can even become a taxpayer...alternatively find out what payout levels require them to report it.

 

[GT21]

I got a letter from my bank today stating that they are discontinuing the relationship due to unsatisfactory account history. I've heard about a shitload of dispensary owners making fairly large regular cash deposits getting shut down, but I'm just a lil guy. I have had an account with this fairly small regional bank for 5 years now and I usually make just one $2400-2800 monthly deposit. I have never made a deposit larger than 4k. I have never had an overdraft fee, I have never written a bad check.

Nobody including senior management will elaborate for me what "unsatisfactory account history" actually means.

Has this happened to anybody else in a similar situation? Anybody have an insightful clue as to what unsatisfactory account history actually means, why this happened and/or know how to prevent it in the future?

Are you proving tax revenue with your deposits. . I have been through this... you can NOT just load cash in an account for years.... oh never mind hahaha

 

[LocalGrowGuy]

It isn't really a large amount of cash you are dealing with. You might want to Google up some options regarding casinos nearby, gambling income is legit. You can even become a taxpayer...alternatively find out what payout levels require them to report it.

Gambling losses can be written off as well. Or so I've heard, or something, perhaps what have you and whatnot.
I do what Jeff Foxworthy says, always bet on whoever does their business on the track before the race starts. They asked me not to attend next years tournament. Apparently casino's frown on pooping in potted plants and butt-scooting across the carpet like the dog.
FWIW, I think the nail in the banks-doing-business-with-MMJ coffin started with these large cash deposits that have the funk. A bank in south denver stopped accepting deposits and ended their relationship with the MMC because of this reason, that cash deposits made the entire branch smell, since banks are subject to federal oversight MJ transactions got the boot.

 

[G gnome]

Next time wash your cash in clothes washer first..

Money laundering! !!!

 

[GreenThumbBill]

Eh, at least you got your answer. Febreeze that cash man. I think you would probably be better off with a credit union or local bank. National banks have pretty strict rules on that stuff and are not going to be at all interested in looking the other way to secure your business. Credit unions may have more flexibility, but I have no clue really.

Dude...literally laundering your cash would be a good idea.

I don't think it really smelled like weed. That was just some made up bullshit. Bitches at the drive through teller just got sick of counting all my 20's. This was at a small local place called Banner Bank. So heads up, don't bank with Banner Bank if you have banking tendencies like me.

 

[GreenThumbBill]

Are you proving tax revenue with your deposits. . I have been through this... you can NOT just load cash in an account for years.... oh never mind hahaha

There is no law in this country that requires workers to pay a direct, unapportianed tax on their labor. Therefore, I have not paid such a tax in 14 years and this is the first problem I have encountered.

And IME, I think the big banks are actually better for smallish cash deposits like mine. I had a Wells Fargo account for 9 years without any issues. I closed it and opened an account at Banner to support local and not support big corporations. I guess my good intentions didn't pay off in this instance.

 

[GreenThumbBill]

It isn't really a large amount of cash you are dealing with. You might want to Google up some options regarding casinos nearby, gambling income is legit. You can even become a taxpayer...alternatively find out what payout levels require them to report it.

Yeah, that's what a buddy of mine does. Goes to an Indian casino with 5-10k in 20's, where there is no buy in limit and plays a couple hours of highly conservative, ABC poker at the 4/8 NL table and walks out with hundreds or a check.

 

[GrowGod]

Money laundering! !!!

Lmao! A multi meaning of the term:D