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Fresh Run. Fresh Room

  • Thread starter Thread starter tattoojim
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Fresh Run. Fresh Room

tattoojim 26,484 Replies 1,903,150 Views
Page 1165 of 1325 · Replies 23,281–23,300 of 26,485
#23,282
Well Fuck!!! it's now after 1 pm and I have spent the whole day so far on getting funeral arrangements for my mother in law that passed 2 days ago. How about giving the family a little time to morn. It's bad enough that she just passed without having a $$$ hungry funeral director on my ass every 15 minutes.

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel sticking out of his pants.....

the bartender asks him...why the hell is a steering wheel sticking out of your pants??

The pirate reply says....Aaaarrrrr, it's driving me nuts!!
 
#23,288
Shit happens


SHIT HAPPENS!!
 
#23,296
A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer.

His friend says: “Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You truly are a kind man.”

The man then replies: “Yeah, well we were married 35 years.”
 
#23,297
G gnome said:
I been refreshin the screen fer hours fer that?
Click to expand...

SeaF0ur said:
A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer.

His friend says: “Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You truly are a kind man.”

The man then replies: “Yeah, well we were married 35 years.”
Click to expand...
Lmao! x 2
 
#23,298
Two guys are sitting on a bar stool. One starts to insult the other one. He screams, “I slept with your mother!” The bar gets quiet as everyone listens to see what the other guy will do....

The first guy again yells, “I SLEPT WITH YOUR MOTHER!”


Mqdefault



The other fella says, “Go home dad you’re drunk.”
 
#23,299
A little boy and his friends are being called bastards and bitches by bullies at school. The boy goes home and asks, "Dad, what are bastards and bitches?" ...his dad replies, "Bitches are ladies and bastards are gentlemen."

Then the boy goes upstairs to see his mom. As he enters the room, he accidentally drops a perfume bottle, and his mom says, "Shit!" .... "Mom, what is shit?" and she says, "Perfume."

So he goes to see his dad (who is carving a chicken), and his dad cuts himself and yells, "Fuck!" kid asks, "Dad, what does fuck mean?" and dad says "preparing."

Then he follows his dad upstairs. A few minutes later his mom and dad are about to have sex when his dad says, "Where are the condoms?" The little boy asks, "What are condoms?" and his father says, "Condoms are coats and jackets."

The following night his father invites over some important business clients. The boy opens the door for them and says, "Hello! you bastards and bitches, please come in... Hang your condoms up here, my mom is upstairs rubbing shit on her face and my dad is downstairs fucking the chicken.
 
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