For the past 10+ years my marriage has been going down hill. My wife blamed her problems on menopause. When I got insuranceI sent her to the Dr for tests but she quit going after the 3rd appt. It finally dawned on me recently that she is a lying, sneaky drunk and this is whats really been the root cause of all our problems. She is still in denial and still functional but has started going on serious drunks on her days off. She is very good at hiding the drinking but the 24 hours in bed afterwards is a dead give away. I'm at the end of my rope and don't have a clue what to do. My daughters apparently realized what was up before I did. Wish they would have said something to me sooner. All I want now is out!
Sometimes the hardest thing to do is whats best. Before you leave you may want to try to intervene. Get together your daughters and tell her how her how drinking is affecting you and your relashonships. If its only you, thats fine, but some support from others goes a long way.
Have her read my story, maybe even go to an AA meeting with her.
You will also need some help coping with whatever comes along. AA could direct you for support, cant hurt for some free advice from those who have been thru what you going thru.
Denial is a bitch. Works both ways. The drinker and the person involed with the drinker suffer. Loved ones enable without even a clue to what there doing by simply putting up with there drinking.
Its easier to allow the misery to continue than to deal with it, along with the many other problems associated with abuse and enabling. Untill its too late or the shit hits the fan and its all over, just gets worse and worse I assure you.
Sounds like youve been together for some time.
Maybe give her once last chance to sober up or else your done.
Thats why an intervention may be in order, lay it all on the line. Give her the choice, my love and support for you or the booze.
My future wife gave me the choice. She loved me so much she could not stand by and see me self destruct.
It finally dawned on me how much of a loser I was due to my drinking.
I had so much to gain and so much to lose If I continued, I know my drinking would have done me in by now, so it was back to AA, pray, hope, I finally got some decent sober time and my head got somewhat straight and now Iam so proud to have achived 11 years, Its an awesome feeling...
Most of important take care of yourself and the reat will follow. Happiness and senerity come from within.. Hang in there, Things will get better IMO if you take a stand and do whats right for yourself first and foremost.The rest will fall into place one day at a time.... CM
