Means a lot, thanks man. I got used to trauma incidents after a couple years, I fall back on the training and stay conscious of the fact that it's happening whether I'm there or not, and the patient is better off with me there. Although some of it stays with you for sure. I think all first responders have at least some degree of PTSD, and some of us more than others. Mine was bad for a while after one of my fellow firefighters was killed by an Impaired driver and I was first on scene. I had weeks where I didnt leave the house or talk to anyone after that, the anxiety it gave me was brutal.
Weed helps to clear the slate when I'm off duty, big time. We all use pot for different reasons, personally for me its the psychological healing as much as it is for my fucked up back...